Kairos

I don't know about you, but the parents who are always talking about how much they cherish every single second with their kids always make me feel a tiny bit lacking. I always want to ask: But what about when they throw a giant tantrum about running errands and end up kicking and screaming on the floor? Do you cherish that moment? Do you just love everything about being a mom THEN? Honestly, sometimes I feel like I am missing some essential mothering gene because, frankly, I find motherhood exhausting, frustrating, and impossible sometimes. Of course, I also find it equal parts  rewarding, hilarious, and exhiliariating, which is why I love this article:
Don't Carpe Diem

I like the idea of counting up each day's "Kairos" moments, because they are a beautiful, beautiful thing. They're also awfully intangible, so when you read an article on the flip side of this issue, along the lines of why anyone would have kids when they just ruin your life, it becomes very difficult to put into words those Kairos moments that make it all worthwhile. Um, I had kids because sometimes my daughter will fetch things for me because I have a bum knee right now. Totally makes up for the three months of her life that she spent crying. Not exactly gonna make someone rush right out and have a baby, is it?

Anyhow, I do spend a great deal of time admiring the little beings I created. They are heart-achingly beautiful and oh so smart. And who cares if the little one kicked off my day by climbing into my bed (I was still asleep) crying about how she didn't want to go to school today (Chronos). Or if she refused to eat breakfast because we had no bagels in the house and WHY WOULD NO ONE DROP EVERYTHING AND GET HER A GODDAMN BAGEL?! (Chronos) Or if she broke my heart by walking into the school building crying? (Chronos) Because surely the smile on the big one's face when I picked her up from school for lunch was Kairos all the way. That awesome look they get on their faces when they are looking for you and finally spot you. (Kairos) The way they smell when they are freshly bathed (especially if someone else did the bathing) (Kairos). Another parent telling you that your child (the little demon who kicked and slammed doors yesterday because she didn't want to go to the mall) is the sweetest in class and so well-spoken and smart to boot? Kairos, baby.

And the truly excellent thing is that I'm sure they have their share of Chronos moments with me as a parent, so it all evens out in the wash!

Speaking of the "carpe diem" crowd, Ella chose a table right next to this elderly couple yesterday at the mall, which I would not have done because I A) like my space and B) try to put some distance between other people and my kids. The elderly gentleman next to me thanked us for sitting near them so he could enjoy my beautiful children. But he did not tell me to enjoy every moment, which is good because I definitely did not enjoy the 25 torturous minutes we spent at Justice after our snack. Chronos.