In Which I Feel Like the World's Worst Mother

When I called daycare at 11, the report was good. Sadie was fine and hadn't shed a tear all day.

Well, when I got there at 4:15 to pick her up, Sadie was sobbing uncontrollably all alone. This is not a child who generally cries like that, and it always upsets me to see her upset. It also bothers me that no one was paying her any attention. The teachers told me that she'd been crying like that on and off for an hour and that they had tried everything to soothe her. I don't know whether to cut them a break or not. It was three other kids' first days too, and it sounds like it had been a very teary day in general. The problem, though, is that I feel utterly unwilling to bring her back tomorrow. I can't stand the thought of her being that upset for so long a period of time. When I asked her why she was crying, she said, "I just really wanted you." Lovely.

As if that wasn't icing enough on my Monday cake, Ella reports that she hates after care and that none of her friends are in after care. She proceeded to name a bunch of her friends--whose moms all stay at home.

I am beyond upset and have no idea what to do about tomorrow. I know it would ridiculous and overdramatic to pull Sadie out of daycare after one day. On the other hand, I'm ready to post an ad for a new nanny and just be done with all the daycare/after care BS. Or, you know, quit my job, which isn't really a viable option at this point in time.

Not a good start to my week. I was hoping that I would be pleasantly surprised, but this day has turned out worse than I feared.